Six audits a week · 2 left for this one

A free audit that a person actually reads your site to write.

Not an automated score emailed in nine seconds. Fourteen checks done by hand on your real pages, written up as a nine-page PDF with the findings ranked by what they cost you — delivered in four working days.

14Checks, done by hand
9 pagesWritten report, not a score
4 daysFrom request to PDF

One free audit per company, ever. It takes about three hours of someone's day, which is why there are six a week and why we ask you to actually read it.

412Audits written since 2023
3 hAverage time spent on each
68%Fixed at least one critical themselves
1 in 5Later became clients
The list, in full

Fourteen checks, published before you ask

You should know exactly what arrives before you hand over access. Nothing on this list is generated by a tool alone — every one is verified by opening the page.

01Load time on a real 4G connectionThrottled, on a mid-range phone, on your three highest-traffic pages.
02The checkout or enquiry path, completedWe go through it as a customer, on iOS and Android, and note where it fights back.
03Mobile layout at 375pxThe width most of your visitors actually have, not the designer's 390.
04Forms: fields, labels and errorsIncluding what happens when someone types a phone number with spaces in it.
05Titles, descriptions and headingsDuplicates, missing descriptions, and pages where the H1 says "Home".
06Image weight and formatThe single most common critical finding, and usually the cheapest to fix.
07Trust signals above the foldPhone, address, returns and delivery promise — present or buried.
08Analytics that is actually recordingA third of the sites we audit have tracking that stopped working months ago.
09Broken links and redirect chainsCrawled fully, then the top thirty verified by hand.
10Search Console errors worth acting onOnly if you grant read access; skipped without it, and the report says so.
11Accessibility basicsContrast, focus states, alt text and keyboard navigation on the main path.
12What your three closest competitors do differentlyNamed, with screenshots, and only where it is a decision rather than a preference.
13Content that contradicts itselfPrices, opening hours and delivery times that disagree between pages.
14One thing to do this weekRanked first in the report, chosen for effort against effect, not for our convenience.
From request to report

Four days, four steps

You spend about ten minutes in total. The rest is on our side.

Day 0

You send the URL

Plus, optionally, read-only analytics access. No call is required and nobody will ring you to "qualify" the request first.

Day 1

We confirm or decline

Within one working day. If your site is outside what we can usefully audit, you are told immediately rather than left waiting.

Days 2–3

Three hours of actual work

Pages opened, path completed on two phones, crawl run, competitors checked, findings ranked by what they cost you.

Day 4

The PDF arrives

Nine pages, plain language, screenshots with arrows. A 20-minute walkthrough call is offered — and it genuinely is optional.

What we need from you

Ten minutes of your time, and no passwords

Your URL, and which pages matter

If you tell us the three pages that make you money, the report is about those. If you do not, we pick them from traffic and say which we chose.

Read-only analytics, if you want that part

Viewer access to your analytics and Search Console makes three of the fourteen checks meaningful. Skip it and those three are marked "not assessed" rather than guessed.

Never a password, never admin

We do not need a login to your website, and we will refuse one if offered. Everything in the audit is done from the outside, exactly as your customers see it.

Why it is free

The catch, written out

Three hours of skilled work given away needs an explanation, or you will assume the report is a sales document with a score on the front.

What you get, no strings

The full nine-page report as a PDF you own, including the findings we would have charged to fix. Roughly two thirds of the people who receive one fix the top item themselves, and that is a fine outcome — an audit that only works if you hire us is not an audit.

No mailing list, no drip campaign, and one follow-up message a fortnight later asking whether you did anything with it. Answer or do not.

What we get

About one in five of these turns into paid work, usually months later and usually starting with the item we ranked first. That ratio is why the audit exists, and it only holds if the report is honest — including when the honest answer is "your site is fine, spend the money on stock instead".

One audit per company, ever. It is not a recurring free service, and asking again from a second email address is obvious and does not work.

Afterwards

What people did with theirs

Two of these three never hired us, which is the point.

"The first finding was that our checkout rejected postcodes with a space in them on one browser. We had been blaming the ad spend for four months. Our developer fixed it in an afternoon."

Portrait of client Rebekah Lindqvist
Rebekah LindqvistOwner · outdoor equipment · never became a client

"Nine pages, no upsell, and page seven said our site was mostly fine and the problem was that nobody knew we existed. That sentence saved us a redesign we had already budgeted for."

Portrait of client Andile Mokoena
Andile MokoenaDirector · B2B services · never became a client

"We sat on the report for five months, fixed two things, then hired them for the rest. Nobody chased us in between, which is the only reason we came back."

Portrait of client Nils Bergström
Nils BergströmMarketing lead · homeware retail · client since 2026
Before you request

Six questions worth answering first

Free, and complete. There is no blurred second half, no "unlock the full report", and no card taken. The report you get is the same document we would hand a paying client, because a half-audit tells you nothing and wastes the three hours we spent making it.

A tool can tell you an image is 3.2 MB. It cannot complete your checkout on an iPhone, notice that your delivery promise contradicts your FAQ, or tell you which of the forty findings is the one that costs you money this month. Three of our fourteen checks use tools; the ranking that makes the report useful does not.

The report contains no prices and no proposal. If you ask what fixing something would cost, you get a number by email. There is exactly one follow-up message, a fortnight later, and it asks what you did rather than what you would like to buy.

Yes, if the client knows and agrees — say so in the request. Agencies use these to get a second opinion, and that is welcome. What we will not do is audit a competitor's site for you, however it is framed.

Sites behind a login we cannot see, sites in a language nobody here reads well enough to judge the copy, and anything under about three months old — a new site has no traffic to reason from, and the audit becomes an opinion. All three get a same-day reply explaining which one it is.

Viewer access only, and we remove ourselves the day the report is sent — you get the confirmation in the same email. Screenshots in the report are yours; we never publish a client's site as an example without asking, and the samples on this page are invented.

2 audit slots left this week

Request yours. Four days, nine pages, no card.

One per company. If the queue is full, you get a date rather than silence — and if we cannot usefully audit your site, you get told within a working day.

  • Complete report, no blurred sections
  • No passwords, no admin access, ever
  • One follow-up message, a fortnight later
Ask a question on WhatsApp

Request the audit

Confirmed or declined within one working day, by a person, from a real address. One audit per company.